


I'm Afraid of the Words in My Notebooks

by atsushinakajima



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Hospitals, Implied Trans Mishima, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Multi, No Phantom Thieves AU, Panic Attacks, Physical Abuse, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-07
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-25 01:06:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12024882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/atsushinakajima/pseuds/atsushinakajima
Summary: He heard the stall door open behind him, panicking as he swore he locked it. He was dragged out by his collar, and there he was; Kamoshida.Mishima started crying, knowing nobody would help him. It was after school. Nobody recorded in the bathrooms. He blacked out before anything else happened, and he was almost glad he did.





	1. I'm Afraid of the Things That I Want to Do but I Won't

Bandages. Something common for Mishima, and here he was. He almost looked like a mummy. He could be assumed dead, vomiting in the toilet, both blood, old food, and some cum. Kamoshida’s abuse to him was getting worse. Physical, sexual, emotional. Each hurt more every time it happened. His wrists and thighs were cut open to cope, and he could only remember Kamoshida’s pocket knife with his threats.

_ “Talk to Ryuuji and that new kid, and I’ll force you to cut open your skin. Or  _ I’ll  _ do it.” _

Mishima had almost ran from Ryuuji and the new kid, despite the fact he was at death’s door with Kamoshida, and  _ needed _ help. He  _ needed  _ to be saved, even though he knew it wouldn’t happen. Not ever.

He heard the stall door open behind him, panicking as he swore he locked it. He was dragged out by his collar, and there he was; Kamoshida. 

Mishima started crying, knowing nobody would help him. It was after school. Nobody recorded in the bathrooms. He blacked out before anything else happened, and he was almost glad he did.

He woke up in the hospital, his arm in a cast, and an IV in his arm. He didn’t know what happened, too hurt to speak to the doctor who commented that he was awake.

“Mishima-san, do you remember what happened?” Asked a nurse. He shook his head. “Your gym teacher found you, I’m so sorry about what the bullies did to you.” She states to him, and he ignored her. The door opened again, revealing another nurse. “Your friends stopped by with flowers!” He stated, placing them next to him. “O-Okay…” He stammered out, confused on who brought them. 

The door opened once more, revealing Ryuuji and the new kid. 

“Yo.” Spoke Ryuuji. The new kid just waved. He heard the heart monitor become faster, and a nurse became worried. “Listen, dude… You okay? We saw Kamoshida drag you out of the bathroom. You looked like an effin mess.” Mishima shook his head for Ryuuji’s question. Ryuuji and the new kid  _ always _ hated Kamoshida, but weren’t aware of the threats exactly.

The new kid came to his side, smiling at him and touching his hand. “Can… I sign your cast?” He asked, and Ryuuji perked up. “Oh yeah! Can I sign it too?”

The boys stayed until visitor hours ended, leaving Mishima a happier boy than he was after school. 

“Oh, Mishima-san, we noticed your self harming. You’ll be headed to the psych ward come week’s end.”


	2. I'm Afraid of the Way That the World Works

Mishima had been in the hospital for about 3 days, Ryuuji and Akira, as the new kid was named, visited him everyday.

Once, after they left to sneak Mishima in something besides hospital food, he was told a new visitor was coming. Mishima nodded, assuming it was a member of the volleyball team, or Ryuuji and Akira coming back sooner. Instead it was his worst fear.

_No! No, No! Nonononnononono!!_

Kamoshida stepped in, and Mishima started crying. His heart monitor went sporadic, getting the nurse to come to his side.

“Sir, please leave the room, Mishima-san isn’t doing well.” Spoke the nurse, and Kamoshida laughed.

“Please! He’s just happy and crying tears of joy.” The nurse shook his head. “Sir, Please leave.” Kamoshida grunted, crossing his arms. He turned his heel and left, leaving the nurse to comfort Mishima.

After a bit, Ryuuji and Akira returned, the nurse away from the room. “Yo! Mishima, what’s up? Oh, damn, you alright?” Ryuuji noticed the dried up tears, and that Mishima’s face was red.

“Ah! K-Kamoshida came in, I got...Scared.” He told them, knowing they wanted to expose Kamoshida’s wrongdoings.

Akira pulled out his phone, messing around with it for a second, before Ryuuji asked him something. “Did… He do this to you? Is he the reason you’re in the hospital?” Akira brought his phone up, squinting at it. Mishima realized he was probably being recorded, and Akira was trying to hide it. “Y-Yeah… He forced me to suck him off and… Broke my arm… And beat me…” He admitted, his voice low. “He groped me a bit too… It hurt…” Mishima started crying. “It really hurt! It hurts, everything hurts, Ryuuji! Akira… Please help me…”

Ryuuji and Akira nodded. “Hey… Mishima, we love you. Both of us do.” Akira spoke again, putting his phone away. “We… Don’t want you to pick, so… Want to date both of us?”

Mishima’s tears became happier, and he nodded. Both boys came to either side of him, kissing his cheeks and hugging him.

 

* * *

 

Come week's end, Akira and Ryuuji were slamming on the desk of the hospital counter.

“What the eff do you mean, we can’t see him? He’s our boyfriend!!” Ryuuji demanded, and the receptionist shook his head. “No, he’s in psychiatric care. He was assumed to be a danger to himself. If he improves on medication he’ll be let out.”

Ryuuji and Akira turned away, sitting on a bench outside the hospital. “Dammit!! I wanted to make sure he’s okay, and now we can’t see him! This effin SUCKS!” Akira nodded, slightly upset with everything. “If it means anything, his arm will probably remove him from the team, and away from Kamoshida, right? And we can publish the video I took of him to really get Kamoshida out of the picture, making Mishima happy.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> early update from what i planned because currently, i'm about to get hit by a hurricane


	3. By Burning Alive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe the last chapter? I got encouraged to do spice by my girlfriend so I might do some Soft And Loving stuff

Mishima hated the psych ward. He was ignored by nurses when he asked for help, but kept on best behavior. He wanted out.

He curled in his bed, scratching at his free wrist. He wanted some closure, but he couldn’t. He was getting antsy and annoyed, but he was finally let out.

Ryuuji and Akira waited outside, lighting up as Mishima stepped out. They charged to hug him, littering Mishima’s face with kisses. 

“Babe! I’m so glad you’re okay…!” Ryuuji stated, pulling away as Akira placed a kiss on Mishima’s lips, leaving him blushing. “H-Hey! Dude, I wanted to kiss him!” Akira smirked, pulling away. “He’s cute, I had to, Ryuuji.” He explained, taking his boyfriend’s hand, Ryuuji carefully doing the same with Mishima’s casted arm. They walked him home, school being over for the day.

 

* * *

 

The next day, Mishima was able to go back to school. His cast managed to be signed by the entire volleyball team, before the worst thing happened.

Kamoshida. Again. He was always there at the worst times.

As Akira stepped in front of the teacher, protecting Mishima’s sight of the man, Ryuuji started explaining his signature to the team.

“Mishima, team.” He states, grabbing Mishima’s cast. He started shaking, and Kamoshida continued.

“Get started with practice. I’ll be speaking to Mishima about his place on the team.” He walked away with Mishima, leaving Ryuuji and Akira shocked. 

“Well. You know what’s up.” Kamoshida’s voice was angered, leading him to the teachers bathroom. “I heard you’re with them, so let’s do two things.” He pulled out his pocket knife, digging it into Mishima’s arm, watching him cry and sob with a smile as he made lacerations on his wrist. Once Kamoshida decided Mishima had enough, him bleeding and crying on the floor. Kamoshida dropped his pants, grabbing Mishima’s hair to bring his mouth up to his crotch.

“Do it. I’ll call the ambulance once you finish.”

* * *

Mishima woke up in the hospital, stitches in his arm. “Welcome back, Mishima-san,” A doctor started, moving next to Mishima. “Your teacher says you were attacked.” She explained, and he spoke up. “N-No… M-My teacher attacked me… H-He… Did everything…” He explained, watching the blood drain out of the doctor’s face. She stepped away, going to a phone.

“Yes, If the teacher hasn’t left… Yes, cops, I’ll try to get more out of him…” Her voice was slightly hushed, but Mishima fell asleep again, too scared of what would happen. It wouldn’t be long until he heard sirens, waking him up again. He nervously stumbled to the window, a nurse with a police officer coming to assist him back to the bed, the officer sitting next to him.

“You’re in here because of your teacher, right?”

Mishima nodded. “What did he do to you? I need a full report.” She asked, staying calm for him.

“He… Was abusive to the boys team and was sexual to some of the girls… He targeted me b-because I-I’m girly and… Have boobs and stuff… So he beats me… A-And forces me to have sex with him…” He explained, before Ryuuji came in, Akira hot on his feet, along with more cops. “W...We have film of him doing that to him!!” He yelled, the nurses who chased him down stopping. Akira pulled out his phone, taking it to the police officer to show her. It was near the end of the event, Mishima taking a few last movements on Kamoshida before blacking out on the floor, before leaving Mishima alone, getting Ryuuji to help him as Akira ended the footage.

The cop nodded, standing up to leave.

 

* * *

 

The day after, Kamoshida was arrested after a long car chase, and a court date was settled for later in the month. Mishima was allowed to go home, getting  _ large _ amounts of love from Akira and Ryuuji during his home recovery. Despite Mishima’s nightmares and trauma, they loved him dearly, adoring their boyfriend and wanting to make sure he was okay at all times, or at least as okay as he could be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know someone wanted kamoshida to get a bad punishment but what the fuck is the police system


End file.
